““One of the criticisms I’ve faced over the years is that I’m not aggressive enough or assertive enough or maybe somehow, because I’m empathetic, it means I’m weak. I totally rebel against that. I refuse to believe that you cannot be both compassionate and strong.”
- Jacinda Ardern (Former Prime Minister of New Zealand)
One of the often-missed concepts when it comes to understanding leadership is the fact that, to be effective in leading others, we have to start with ourselves. That is, if I am not able to motivate myself, if I cannot navigate my own internal emotional state, if I am unable to overcome the challenges I face, then it is unlikely I will be successful as a leader. Enter self-leadership. Self-leadership is my ability to lead myself—to influence myself, to successfully manage my own emotions, to push myself to accomplish my goals, etcetera.
Every leader needs to be adept at self-leadership. But I specifically want to speak to women because, we have unique qualities and strengths that make us potential natural leaders, both in our personal lives and our careers. To harness this power and achieve personal growth, it's crucial to develop essential self-leadership skills. These skills empower us to navigate challenges, set goals, and continually evolve into the best versions of ourselves.
In my work with women, I am often surprised to realize we do not recognize our own innate abilities, or cultivate them towards effectiveness as leaders. Further, we often fail to begin with the self, to nurture what we have internally, and express those competencies overtly to both ascend into, and succeed in leadership positions.
Let's explore ten key self-leadership skills that can transform your life—personally and professionally.
1. Self-Awareness
Self-awareness is the foundation of self-leadership. It involves understanding your values, strengths, weaknesses, and emotions. By gaining insight into yourself, you can make informed decisions that align with your goals and values. But, you might ask, aren’t we all pretty much self-aware? I’d counter that no, self-awareness is a journey, we need to be constantly reflecting and gauging ourselves. As a leader, am I clear about my strengths and weaknesses? Am I aware of my own emotions and how they impact others? Do I have clarity about my values, and am I living up to those values? What about my aspirations, am I clear about where I want to be and who I want to become?
2. Emotional Intelligence
This is a big one in the journey of self-leadership —emotional intelligence allows you to manage your emotions effectively and empathize with others. It's a powerful skill that fosters healthy relationships and helps you handle stress and conflicts with grace. As I’ve blogged about this before, emotional intelligence entails both self-and other components: self-awareness and selfp-mastery, social awareness and relationship management respectively. EI is foundational to effective leadership overall, without it, leaders will flounder at leading the self as well as leading others.
3. Goal Setting
If we do not set goals, then we are set to fail. Goal-setting is a requisite skill for effective leaders,
Setting clear, achievable goals provides direction and motivation. Further, when we set goals, we are likely to trigger new behaviors and be more focused so that we can accomplish those goals, which in turn contributes to a sense of self-mastery. Since we cannot master that which we do not measure, setting goals enables us to push ourselves towards mastery, and the sense of accomplishment contributes to added motivation. None of us wants to be constantly looking at our goals and feeling like failures…
4. Time Management
We all have 24 hours in a day…most of us leaders often wish we had more to accomplish all the goals and tasks in our purview. Efficiently managing your time ensures that you can balance your responsibilities effectively. Prioritize tasks and eliminate time-wasting habits to make the most of your day.
5. Resilience
Resilience is your ability to bounce back from setbacks and adversity. Developing this skill helps you stay determined and positive, even in the face of challenges. Leaders who have cultivated their capacity for resiliency are more effective at navigating the many changes and challenges they face both at a personal level, and in their professional settings. Further, resilient leaders are more reliable during crisis.
6. Decision-Making
As leaders and/or entrepreneurs, we are constantly making decisions, whether on a personal or professional level. At a personal level, we make decisions at the micro-level, such as what to eat for lunch, how early to get up in the morning, where to focus our attention…Enhancing our decision-making skills then contributes to our success at navigating our lives at home, at work, in the community, by gathering information, considering alternatives, and trusting our judgment. Indecisive, wishy-washy leaders leave their stakeholders frustrated and confused.
7. Self-Motivation
As mentioned in the introduction, being able to motivate yourself is part of self-leadership. Self-motivation is the driving force behind achieving your goals, despite, and amid, internal struggles and external challenges. Cultivate habits that keep you inspired and focused, even when obstacles arise. Personally, I find it necessary to employ self-motivation when I am feeling discouraged by slow business, or when am struggling with the chronic health issues that threaten to derail my goals. Engaging in self-care actually contributes towards my ability to sustain motivation towards achieving my goals.
8. Communication
Leaders who are not able to communicate well are unlikely to succeed long-term. After all, leadership is about getting things done through and with others. Similarly, entrepreneurship requires effective communication —with our internal as well as external stakeholders. Enhance your listening and speaking skills to connect with others and convey your ideas persuasively.
9. Adaptability
One of my former leaders use to say, the only constant in life is change. Or, to quote a frequently occurring meme, ‘change happens’. To succeed in leading thyself, embrace adaptability as a skill to thrive in evolving situations. Flexibility enables you to adjust to new challenges and opportunities, and that entails employing a growth, rather than fixed mindset. Adaptability enables you to make the transitions necessary to deal with evolving external circumstances – such as financial crisis, new taxes, and other changes in the macro environment.
10. Self-Care
We cannot overemphasize the need for women to incorporate self-care into their schedule. We give so much of ourselves not only at work or business, but also in our families and communities. Taking care of yourself is not selfish; it's self-leadership. Prioritize self-care routines that nourish your physical, spiritual and mental well-being. We cannot give others water if our own wells are empty. So be sure to refill, to replenish yourself, to put yourself as a priority in your planning and goal setting.
Conclusion
As women, we have the power to lead with strength, empathy, and resilience. By honing these ten essential self-leadership skills, you can embark on a journey of personal growth that not only benefits you but also inspires those around you. Self-leadership is a continuous process — a journey rather than a destination. Start today by enrolling and completing our self-paced virtual course, The Power of Self-Leadership, and watch as you become a more confident and influential leader in every aspect of your life.
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Copyright 2023 Faith Ngunjiri, Ed.D